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To die by your side is such a heavenly way to die

link (these photos are sourced from my tumblr/pinterest)

Happy Valentine's Day, lovers!! Normally I wouldn't make a post for this specific holiday because I'm sort of a pessimistic bitter single person, but I really like pink and red together, if you weren't already aware. Also it was part of my New Year's resolution to be less of a total bummer when it comes to love/romance/etc., so I'm trying to embrace the "" Valentine Spirit "". 

I used to hate Valentine's Day, and when I say "used to",  you must understand that this is a very recent development of not hating it. Like, literally a year ago today, I was complaining about Valentine's Day loudly to anyone who would listen in my neuroscience class.  "It's so pointless," I moaned, "it's just created by evil companies who keep feeding us this idea that buying things for someone means you love them, and it supports the consumerist and capitalist hellscape that is America." To everyone listening to this rant, however, it translated to "I Am A Bitter Single Person Who Knows A Lot of Smart-Sounding Buzzwords!" (Which, honestly, sums me up pretty well.) The girl who sat behind me (who's name is Tovah, if you're reading this HI TOVAH) piped up: "I love Valentine's Day. Yes, I have a boyfriend, but there are so many other people in my life that I love -- my family, my friends. You don't have to be in a relationship to celebrate the people that you love!"

Now, 2017 Meagan was so not down with this hippie-dippy, lovey-dovey-type of shit. And she probably grumbled something indistinct under her breath and continued to hate Valentine's Day. But 2018 Meagan is embracing it, goddamnit. This year I am totally prepared to feel happy and loved and cherished by the people in my life, and express my love for them too. How does one express love to others without contributing to the consumerist and capitalist hellscape that is America, you might ask? Well, you could choose not to give a shit and buy some chocolates anyways, because like, we can't all be ethical saints year-round. Or, you could do what I'm gonna do, and make Molly Yeh's annual almond Valentine's Day cake. Or you could make some homemade valentines, or something else cutesy and DIY if you are willing to be totally granola like I inevitably will be. The least you can do is wear red and pink together, because it's the cutest color combo of. all. time.

Now enjoy this picture of me wearing underwear outside of my clothes, in the name of loooove. (I also added a cheesy sparkle clipart because I secretly adore them.) Happy V-Day, tell someone you love them today!!♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Shirt: Zara
Dress: Vintage
Shoes: Also Zara, oops.

(Also thanks to my friend Iman for this very intense photo of me!)

Why fashion blogging kinda sucks, and why I'm still here

Okay these pics has nothing to do with the post but I like them and they're kinda moody

"There must be something worthier of my time and energy than this, there must be..."

This ultra-dramatic quote is from my journal, written late last fall. It was after an exhausting day of scrolling and posting and stalking those who had more expensive clothes than me -- a day of just feeling inadequate, in general. Even those who don't have ~fashion blogs~ can relate. In fact, I'm sure that like, 99.9% of the people on this planet who have social media can relate. Everywhere, like literally everywhere, there are scary articles about how social media could be causing millennials to have severe anxiety and how social media usage and depression are positively correlated (although, as every Psych professor has ever told me: correlation does not equal causation). In fact, for simplicity, let me just link all of the Google Scholar results for "social media and depression".  You may peruse to your heart's content.

So I guess the main question here is : why am I still doing this Promoting Myself On Social Media And The Internet type of shit? And I've been doing it for like, almost 8 years. I must be a masochist or something, right? Even when I was 13, I was feeling shitty about my fashion blog, comparing myself obsessively to girls my age who were living all my dreams. What's the point? After years and years of comparison and self-criticism, I asked myself this same question and ultimately deleted my old blog completely. But here I am again.
I just think this comparison is hilarious: me in 2013 (as a freshman in high school!!) vs. me like 2 days ago

Moving aside the fact that I am sincerely, totally, completely a crazy person who makes questionable decisions regarding her mental health sometimes, I'm really glad I decided to come back and do this whole blogging thing again. And yeah, some days it's super hard going onto Instagram and comparing oneself to a butt-ton of people who own 500% more Chanel than me, but as a wise 21-year-old I appreciate blogging a lot more than I did as a 13-year-old. I see more merit in sharing my ideas and photos and clothes, even if basically no one cares. Like, you don't have to be the daughter of a celebrity with 40000 million Instagram followers to make worthy content.  My content is worthy! And it's worthy because I assign it worth by myself, not by getting worth and validation from others. I'm really proud of my outfits, my photos and the things I write. And honestly, that's all that fucking matters.

I know I'm sort of beating a dead horse here, but this post is as much of a reminder to myself as it is to the 4 people reading this: make stuff anyways. I have 150 followers on my Instagram, but I'm still putting together outfits, because I just really, really love being a huge narcissist with a bunch of pictures of myself STUNTING so I can use them to catfish people on Craigslist. And no matter how many followers I do (or don't) have, that dedication (to catfishing) (also fashion) will never change. 

Love 2 scowl in foreign countries


Quick update from the gloomiest place ever besides maybe Siberia, ENGLAND!! I've been here for a little less than a month and damn, do I miss the constant fashion photos and outfit posts. Ever the servant to clothes, however, I stopped by Brick Lane in London to pick up this gauzy tulle dress because everyone needs to be able to wear a dress over their jeans sometimes. Also I'm using this as a stand in for a Molly Goddard dress, since I can't afford Molly Goddard, but the fact that I have passed Dover Street Market in London and was not able to go in because it would just cause me to make poor spending decisions is weighing on me. (Apparently they now have Jacquemus there as well, which is V E R Y dangerous. I might peek in just to see all my favorite pieces from his La Bomba line and hyperventilate over them in real life.)

Anyways, just wanted to share the only mildly stylish outfit I have in this god forsaken country. Carry on.

(Thought I might as well add in some sunny pics, when it was actually sunny for about 0.32 seconds.)

Shirt: Topshop
Jeans: Zara 
Dress: Vintage
Shoes: Zara again (i am a terrible Sustainable Fashion Lady, but they were only £9.)
Socks: I think Macy's? 

And thanks to my friend Iman for the pictures!! I can't promise any more fashion stuff any time soon but eh, we'll see.

How to look like a shiny sparkly bich 101


With New Year's Eve fast approaching, I thought I would take some time to help my darling internet readers with choosing what to wear for their respective parties. New Year's Eve is fun for some people and ignites existential crises in others (i.e. me) so I'll get everyone through either scenario!!

Of course, new years is about one thing: being shiny and sparkly. I feel like it's normal to wear a 20's flapper dress and go all Great Gatsby-ish because that makes being disgustingly drunk sort of acceptable, nay, expected! But here on the amazing fashion blog refleurira, this New Year's Eve tagline is: The Unexpected. So like, the point here is to be kinda funky and unexpected, and don't look like a flapper girl. Instead, look like a crazy person! 2018 is about to be a craaaaazy year. I can feel it. Thus we must dress for the occasion.

Here's what I've come up with if you're kinda a happy bich, and you think New Year's Eve is a cute and fun time. You probably have a significant other that you're happily in love with, or maybe you just got a new job and things are looking up for you, etc. :

happy sparkly gorl

The key here is to have as many reflective surfaces on your body as possible, also a lot of warm fuzzy stuff too, just in case you must spontaneously sneak away to drink a whole bottle of champagne in the bushes and it's like 2 degrees outside. Heeled boots are also a good idea, because they're not as treacherous as stilettos if you're drunk. (Not that I would know! ha ha!)

This next collage is how one would look if you dislike New Year's Eve! Maybe you have no one to kiss when the ball drops, or maybe you're just a deeply pessimistic person who can't help but think what fresh horrors the next year will bring, or maybe you hate being made aware of your own mortality. Whatever the case may be, here's how you look cute but also kinda like you're in mourning when going to a New Year's party : 

sad gorl new year's

Looking sad and hopeless but also really cute is the main idea. ((If you can't tell I'm a bit obsessed with Shrimps, gahhhh their stuff is just TOO. GOOD.)) I've also added necessary existential literature in case you're staying home from the party and contemplating absurdism. The eyes on the left outfit are staring into the void, and the sparrows on the right are flying away into the meaningless of life!

If any of you are wondering how I'm doing New Year's Eve, here's a special shoot I put together, with sparkly grey eyes and a big shiny dress thing. As you can see, I'm going more for the muted colors and existential crisis look :

Happy New Year's everyone!!

Dress(es): vintage
Shoes: Coach

All photos shot by me with my canon d600 and an 18-135mm lens.

Alicia Keys and I have a lot in common, actually


me with no makeup and my tits kinda out

An integral point in every woman's life, I believe, is the point where the woman decides if she will wear makeup or not. Naysayers might argue that this is totally not an important part of a woman's life, and that's kind of shallow of me to say, and isn't there a lot to womanhood besides for wearing makeup, and you're dumb i'm going to unfollow your freckly ass!

But hear me and my freckly ass out. Does any other human female in the audience remember the day that they first decided to wear makeup to school? I sure as fuck do, mostly because I wrote about it in my diary, aged 12, 7th grade. I didn't go all out, like I only wore mascara or whatever, but it was super embarrassing and people pointed it out to me, which made me decide that I would never wear makeup again! Of course I did later. When I was in high school, makeup and I were close, personal friends. We hung out everyday. we read Harry Potter together and discussed punk rock feminism at length. Me and makeup were getting along great. 

I don't remember the point where I decided to basically stop wearing it on a casual basis, only really breaking out the shimmery eyeshadow for formal events and parties. Now my non-makeup face is sort of like a Thing that I own. It's part of the Meagan Wilson Brand™ : she's the girl who doesn't wear makeup! Basically, I'm alicia keys without talent or money. Also she's definitely more beautiful than me, and everyone else in the world. 

But now I'm on the cusp of 21 (a month!!!!!!! a month) and I have this nagging voice in the back of my head, the same voice that keeps telling me to buy Lululemon leggings, saying this: "You Need To Start Wearing Makeup And Become A Goddamn Adult". And yeah, this voice is sort of an asshole, but it also has a fair point. women who wear makeup are way more likely to get a job and get more money from said job. That freaks me out! I would like to get a job! I would like to get a lot of money from this job. I should probably start wearing makeup. I don't even have a proper red lipstick. Someone buy me a contour palette THIS INSTANT.

Panicking aside, however, I don't like wearing makeup. I don't want to have to do that just to get a job. Makeup feels weird and chunky on my face and it's annoying getting it off and I don't have the motivation to put it on, ever. I love being feminine but, jesus, performing femininity all the time makes me tired. The women who have beautiful makeupped faces every single day are stronger than I will ever be. They look lovely, they get something out of wearing it, and good for them!! But it's absolutely ridiculous that we must wear makeup to get a job or money or anything, really. It should be our choice to wear it or not. Agency over our own faces shouldn't be an issue here. But it is. 

I don't know if i'll ever change how I feel about this, or if one day I'll wake up and decide to be very into doing a cat-eye all the time. And if i ever have a Very Professional job interview, like a job that pays more than minimum wage (that'll be the day), I will probably wear makeup because I care more about getting a job than most other things. 

But can we stop makeup from being a necessary thing for women, maybe? Can we stop shaming women for not wearing it? (Also can we stop shaming women for wearing it, too? You can really never win here. Basically, if you identify as a woman, you cannot win.) 

A little-known fact is that us delicate ladies don't actually enjoy being under the confines of the patriarchy, and we just want to be treated like human beings and do what we want. So, for fuck's sake, if we don't want to wear makeup, let us not wear makeup.
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